The 1st December issue of Jinja Shinpō contained the new instalment of Revd Tagawa’s column, picking up the story after her marriage.
She opens by saying that, ever since she became chief priest at the age of 24, she had worried about who would look after the jinja if she became pregnant and gave birth. And then, almost before she knew it, she was in her thirties, had been married for two years, and the ujiko had started asking whether there were going to be children soon. She was feeling the pressure, and worried what the kami thought.
At that point, an acquaintance made contact again. This person was a qualified priest from a jinja family, but was studying female priests at graduate school. (As a linguistic note, I am pleased to see Revd Tagawa using the Japanese meaning “female priest” rather than the conventional “girl priest”.) She had contacted Revd Tagawa as part of her research, but as they talked about various issues, Revd Tagawa told her about the pressures, and she offered to come from Tokyo and help out for a week or two per month. She could combine this with her research, but as Revd Tagawa watched her perform the ceremonies she felt a weight lift from her shoulders. She also felt that it was a push towards motherhood from the kami.
So, she began “ninkatsu” (妊活), activities with a view to getting pregnant. (Stop sniggering, Smithers.) The road was longer and harder than she imagined (Smithers, I’m warning you…), but in the end she was entrusted with a new life. However, she was not simply delighted about it. Worries about whether she could bring this new life into the world, particularly while serving as chief priest, developed into fear.
And then, when she had reached the stable period of pregnancy (I do not know what the English for this is — my “direct” experience of pregnancy was in Japanese), a couple who had offered a prayer for safe birth at the jinja about a month earlier came to return the ofuda and omamori. The woman, who looked like she was suffering, also asked Revd Tagawa to take down the ema with her request on. This was the first time such a thing had happened, although the jinja, whose name means “Fortunate Mother Hachiman Jinja”, does a lot of safe birth prayers. Revd Tagawa took it as a hint from the kami not to be careless.
When she became chief priest, she resolved that she would live only for the role, but in this period the mixture of herself as chief priest and herself as an individual was more complex than it had ever been before. She also noticed a change in her practice at the jinja. She paid her respects to the kami every morning, before the first morning matsuri, and previously she had made a lot of requests then. After she became pregnant, however, she did nothing but express gratitude. She no longer took it for granted that she passed every day safely.